Lost in Manhattan: Is It Cheating If You Have A Sleepover With An Ex?
"Just because he's staying with his ex girlfriend and her family for a week doesn't mean he's gonna fuck her, right?"
-Parker
Last night I was up late killing time on Tumblr, like one does at one in the morning, when I got a Facebook chat from Parker. After asking if I was still awake, she sent a a series of hysterical messages about The Tardis and how she thinks he's cheating on her. I couldn't understand the gibberish of mistypes and spelling erros so I told her I'd go up to her apartment if she wanted. She begged me to, with the promise of sharing her Strawberry Vodka.
I had never been inside Parker's apartment before. It was twice the size of mine (which really isn't a big feat) and if possible, even messier. The walls were covered in Doctor Who framed prints, Supernatural posters, and a portrait of Albert Einstein. We climbed over her bed (which was covered in clothes, text books, and a Mac Book) to go out on her fire escape. She had obviously been crying and was drinking Smirnoff out of a Boba Fett mug.
"So what's going on?"
"I think he's cheating on me."
Now I could recall the conversation in a well written recap, or I could just copy down the rant that I reordered on my iPhone. And seeing as how I was up until 4am on a fire escape, here's a shortened version of Parker's low down:
"We're both broke, you know? We don't have a lot of money or else we'd spend it seeing each other. We've been saving up for San Diego so we can share a hotel room and everything. But get this! He casually tells me today that he's going to spend the next WEEK in California! He says he has a meeting with some people from Marvel about a possible job opportunity. I say that's great but how is he affording everything? He said his dad lent him some money for a plane ticket and he's staying with some friends in LA. But then I get confused. Marvel comics offices are in New York, not LA so why would he have a job offer there? And then hours later I ask who he's staying with and it turns out, his ex girlfriend and her family! Now I know they dated for like, forever before her family moved to the US but it doesn't make sense! His meeting is only ONE DAY and yet he's staying a whole week. He could easily fly out to New York or take a bus or something and stay with me for the rest of the trip! But I know how his dad bought him the plane ticket and everything and it just sucks. He doesn't even think its weird that he's staying with his ex girlfriend's family. I just don't know. I see him tweeting at her sometimes and he doesn't with me because he's trying to keep our relationship a secret so people don't harass me even more than they do now. But, how fucked up is this? It's fucked up right?"
I've been in long distance relationships before, a few shorter ones and one that turned into an actual relationship. All of whom I've met off of Twitter. Parker and The Tardis met through Tumblr (if you recall) and have been dating since August but have not actually met. Here's the thing, obviously this situation isn't right for Parker at all. It isn't right that she's in a relationship with a guy who is staying with his ex girlfriend for a week when she hasn't even met her in person yet. But that's the thing: is it a real relationship because they haven't met?
She doesn't have any "real" rights as a girlfriend because they haven't crossed that boundary of actually touching each other yet. It doesn't seem fair and people in LDR would probably argue with me that love is love no matter and all that other bullshit. Then again, a relationship is a relationship and if he loves her, which he tells her he does, wouldn't he care about how she feels? And isn't his Marvel interview in LA and not New York kind of shady?
These days long distance relationships between people who have met on the Internet is shockingly common. You search the "LDR" tag on Tumblr and you've met with hundreds of stories about love affairs reaching around the world. A guy in Australia connected with his "true love" in Maryland, USA. Everyone from lovesick teenagers to business adults are making connections in a way that has never been done before this generation.
Last month Durex announced their "Fundawear", a series of underwear that can be stimulated over the Internet. Your significant other can get to second base, operating sensors over a bra of your man's under roos. Couples like Parker and The Tardis can please each other without having to meet, ever. When I mentioned this to her, Parker said the Fundawear isn't available yet but she would buy a set in a heartbeat. That is, if they were still together by the time it came out.
I didn't have much advice for her, except that if she trusts him then it shouldn't be too big of a problem. So instead we shared a black and mild on her fire escape, watching taxis speed down Broadway at 2 in the morning and hoped for the best.
She doesn't have any "real" rights as a girlfriend because they haven't crossed that boundary of actually touching each other yet. It doesn't seem fair and people in LDR would probably argue with me that love is love no matter and all that other bullshit. Then again, a relationship is a relationship and if he loves her, which he tells her he does, wouldn't he care about how she feels? And isn't his Marvel interview in LA and not New York kind of shady?
These days long distance relationships between people who have met on the Internet is shockingly common. You search the "LDR" tag on Tumblr and you've met with hundreds of stories about love affairs reaching around the world. A guy in Australia connected with his "true love" in Maryland, USA. Everyone from lovesick teenagers to business adults are making connections in a way that has never been done before this generation.
Last month Durex announced their "Fundawear", a series of underwear that can be stimulated over the Internet. Your significant other can get to second base, operating sensors over a bra of your man's under roos. Couples like Parker and The Tardis can please each other without having to meet, ever. When I mentioned this to her, Parker said the Fundawear isn't available yet but she would buy a set in a heartbeat. That is, if they were still together by the time it came out.
I didn't have much advice for her, except that if she trusts him then it shouldn't be too big of a problem. So instead we shared a black and mild on her fire escape, watching taxis speed down Broadway at 2 in the morning and hoped for the best.
P.S. -Let's also take a moment to fawn over the amazing artwork Chris Flocco did of the girls! Without seeing actual pictures of them (to keep their identities anonymous), Chris was able to perfectly capture them all. I especially adore the Rebel Alliance shirt/sweater combo. Even though 'Parker' has different tattoos in real life, she loves the ones her character has. Thanks again so much Chris!
Previously on Lost in Manhattan:
1.) Gelato & an Idea